Name, Rank, and Serial Number

I asked several single friends, both male and female, to tell me how often they knew the home address of a first date who was picking them up or meeting them somewhere. The answer I most often heard was "rarely," which stunned me at first. Then, the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was logical - though not terribly sensible. Most first date arrancements in the 90s sound something like this:

"you want to get together sometime?"
"Yeah. Sounds great."
"Great! Can I call you?"
"Sure. Here's my office mumber, my fax, my e-mail address, my beeper number, my cell phone, and my car phone."
"I'll give you a buzz."

When he or she does call, a specific home address simply doesn't come up in conversation unless it's needed for directions.

That's what I'd like you to change. During your rundown of numbers and letters and e-mail addresses, I'd like you to ask one simple question: Where abouts do you live?


Your date-to-be may or may not want to give an exact address - which is okey - but if they're reluctant to give any clues, you may want to ask why. And while you're at it, make sure you know your date's last name (and how to spell it). If he or she is hesitant to freely offer any of this information, consider it a red flag because there are precious few reasons why someone would withhold full disclosure:

They're married.
They live with their mother.
They are embarrassed by their neighbourhood.
They live in a car.